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Resources

TriCounty Health 2018 – Personality Profiles

Click here for handouts of the presentation.

I was invited to present about Personality Profiles at a staff retreat for the TriCounty Health Department. We had a great time learning about how the Golden Rule may not be quite correct. Instead, we must seek to understand what someone else may desire so that we can tailor our approach rather than assuming that everyone wants the same things as we do. Here is a copy of the Personality Profile Questionnaire and of the entire presentation. Below are the videos that were mentioned in the presentation that we didn’t have time for.

Below is a copy of the Hartman Personality Profile Test.

Here are the videos that feature Dr. Hartman and his description of the different colors.

Here is another video that talks about how different colors work in relationships…especially marriage.

UAEYC 2018 – Mindset in the Classroom & Beyond

Christina and I were able to present at the 2018 Utah Association for the Education of the Young Child conference. We discussed how early childhood educators can foster a growth mindset in their children as well as themselves and coeducators.

 

 

Mindsets in the Classroom & Beyond – UAEYC Conference 2018

Here are the presentation and other materials that we used.

Click here to download the presentation.

Mindset Questionnaire

origami-crane-print

Thanks everyone for coming and supporting us.

Dinner is Served – Relationship Mindsets – March 2018

We had another wonderful Dinner is Served event. We had some great food and great company. We wanted to extend special appreciation to Smith’s for donating the cookies.

Click here to download the presentation.

Here are some is the video that explains the importance of having a growth mindset.

Here are the instructions that we used for the origami activity and the questionnaire that lets you know how you perceive yourself and your relationship.

Mindset Questionnaire

origami-crane-print

Thanks again everyone for coming. We had a great turnout.

6 Ways to Enjoy Christmas Break

It begins! For the next 13 days, your children are home from school. It won’t be long until you hear those familiar words, “I’m bored,” (if you you’ve already heard them). While it’s nice to have more time as a family, it can feel overwhelming to fill that time without fighting.

1. Take time for yourself

It’s easy to let your usual schedule go during the holidays. While it’s nice to relax a bit, don’t forget to schedule time for self-care. Waking at your usual time can give you a chance to read a book, meditate, sip a cup of coffee or tea, exercise, or do whatever fills your battery. You’ll be better able to parent the way you’d like after taking time for yourself.

2. Maintain a routine

Children thrive on routine. They like to know what is coming next in their day. While they, too, are likely looking forward to a change of pace, it’s important to keep at least some of their schedule as it usually is. Perhaps they will sleep in a bit, but then they’ll eat breakfast and do their chores as they typically do. Whatever you decide to do, make it predictable, especially for younger children.

3. Start with a good meal

The holidays are filled with sugary treats that can leave us all feeling less-than-optimal. Knowing you and your family will be indulging later, start the day with a balanced meal. It doesn’t have to be elaborate; something as simple as oatmeal can give you and your kids the energy you need for your day.

4. Family Projects

School breaks can be a good time to accomplish tasks that don’t fit into a typical week. Make a list of things you’d like to see accomplished, then sit down as a family and brainstorm what has been neglected around the house, and schedule some of it into your days. Whether that’s cleaning ceiling fans, washing walls, or finding outgrown or unused items to donate, this extra time at home can provide opportunities to work together as a family to make everyone’s lives a little calmer when it’s time to go back to school.

5. Family Traditions and Rituals

The holidays are a great time to create and practice family traditions and rituals. Maybe you already practice some rituals or traditions. Get your family together and discuss favorite traditions and some you’d like to add. Trying to do it all can be overwhelming, but selecting a few things that are meaningful to your family can make the holidays more enjoyable. Whether your traditions are new or old, they create wonderful experiences for bonding as well as life-long memories.

6. Let it go

Take some time to relax as a family. It’s impossible, not to mention miserable, to try to accomplish everything this time of year. If you’re feeling rushed, let some things go. You might be surprised to find you don’t miss them. Take some time to play in the snow, sit around the fire, read Christmas books, or watch your favorite Christmas movie together. Whatever you choose, pause from the holiday hustle and make this a guilt and worry-free time. Calm, slow days can be rare, so take advantage of them while you can.

Enjoying Christmas Break is about balance. When you take care of yourself and mix fun with routines, you’re better able to see where that balance is. With a little planning and communication, the whole family can enjoy this break.

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Higgins Family Center provides a variety of services including individual, couple, family, and distance services. We also offer individualized parent coaching, parenting classes, supervised visitation, and postpartum doula services. Would you like to meet with us? Call or text 435-828-3255.

Christina Higgins, MS, is an experienced parenting coach and postpartum doula. She works with parents of children birth through adolescence in the Uintah Basin.

Jesse P. Higgins, MS, LMFT, CFLE is a licensed marriage and family therapist. He works with adolescents, adults, couples, and families in the Uintah Basin. He specializes in helping you reach any individual, parenting, or relationship goal. 

 

 

7 Easy Ways to Survive Christmas When You Have To Be Away From Your Family

The holidays are a stressful time for most families. Between shopping and visiting family, it is easy for the spirit of Christmas to get lost in the shuffle. It can be even more difficult when a loved one’s shift requires them to be away on the big day. This is hard for all members of the family because many of us dream of the perfect Christmas morning with everyone gathered by the tree to open presents. But, it can be possible to still have a great Christmas even when dad is away.

1. Plan to celebrate Christmas on a different day

It may not be exactly the same, but just celebrating on a different day when the whole family can be together can be the next best thing. It can be really easy to pull off with younger children who aren’t quite sure what day it is yet.

2. Invite someone who may also be away from their family

Often the most challenging part of being alone on Christmas is just that – being alone. Is there someone else who isn’t able to spend time with their family? Your family could invite a neighbor who may be looking for someone to spend Christmas with. You could also ask a coworker or friend to spend some time together.

3. Enjoy some of your traditions from afar

Traditions are an essential part of what makes Christmas special. Maybe there is a special meal or treat that you have every year. Maybe your family likes to go to the movies. Finding a way to still have those special items or activities on the big day can help bridge the distance with your family.

4. Find some time to stay connected on the big day

Technology can help stay connected even when we are out of town and working. Skype, phone calls, texts, and pictures can help us feel like we are not entirely missing out.

5. Reflect on what makes Christmas special for you and your family

For many of us, Christmas is a unique time of year not just because of our time-honored traditions and time spent with our families. Christmas reminds us of the importance of giving and sacrifice. Taking time to contemplate the true meaning of Christmas can help us feel the spirit of this time of year even when we are away from those we love.

6. Watch a favorite Christmas movie

Christmas isn’t complete without enjoying a favorite Christmas movie, whether it be Christmas Vacation, A Christmas Story, Elf, or another classic.

7. Read a Christmas story together

Whether near or far, you can almost feel you’re in the same room when reading a story together over the phone or Skype. This could be Polar Express, the Bible Christmas story, or any holiday favorite. Best of all, this experience is a great way to stay connected whether it’s Christmas day or a random Wednesday.

Christmas can be hard when we are not able to spend it with our families because of our work schedule or other conflicts. However, with a little bit of effort, you can find ways to connect with your family and experience the spirit of Christmas.

 

Jesse P. Higgins, MS, LMFT, CFLE is a licensed marriage and family therapist. He works with adolescents, adults, couples, and families in the Uintah Basin. He specializes in helping you reach any individual, parenting, or relationship goal. 

Christina Higgins, MS, is an experienced parenting coach and postpartum doula. She works with parents of children birth through adolescence in the Uintah Basin.

Higgins Family Center provides a variety of services including individual, couple, family, and distance services. We also offer individualized parent coaching, parenting classes, supervised visitation, and postpartum doula services. Would you like to meet with us? Call or text 435-828-3255.

Dinner for Two (or Three, or Four, or Twenty)

Thanksgiving is just three short days away. Many of us enjoy gathering with family and friends to celebrate all we have a share a meal together.

While we can’t dine with family scattered across the country or the world every day, we can make an effort to eat with our family at home.

You may have heard the family mealtime is important for children. It sounds great, but you’re really busy. Does it really make a difference?

Yes. Children and adolescents who eat dinner with their families . . .

  • Experience depression less often
  • Are more likely to experience better mental health
  • Have a higher vocabulary
  • Have an increased likelihood of having a good relationship with their parents (which leads to):
  • Have a decreased chance of substance use
  • Are more likely to eat more vegetables and fruits
  • Are less likely to eat fast food and soft drinks
  • Get better grades in school
  • More likely to be a healthy weight

. . . and the list could continue.

Family meals sound pretty important, right? What keeps us from having regular meals as a family, and why do so many of our meals just feel like a fight?

We are busy. Everyone, from the adult(s) in the family to the smallest child, has a different schedule. Perhaps you work late or need to go to bed early for a morning shift. Maybe you have a young child with an early bedtime and a teenage child who participated in evening sports. Getting everyone together to eat is no easy task.

So, what can we do?

As with all things, do what you can.

Simplify or reduce the number of activities that limit family mealtimes, if possible

Can you trade shifts at work? Can your teenager drop a sport or club?

Sometimes you can’t work out daily family mealtime, but plan it whenever you can.

It doesn’t have to be dinner

If you find your family all together in the morning, gather for a family breakfast. If you don’t want to (or can’t) get up earlier, prepare some breakfast meals ahead of time.

If you find one or more children are struggling to make it to the table, find a way to entice them; while it’s not advised to cater to every individual food request, try to have something everyone enjoys eating at some time during the week. Preparing what you can in advance can fit breakfast into as short as 20 minutes from cooking to the last bite.

  • Cook extra waffles on the weekend to pop in the toaster
  • Make overnight oatmeal in the crockpot
  • Make an egg casserole to reheat
  • Keep fruits and vegetables on hand, and slice what you can the night before

You’ve found some time to eat as a family, but you find everyone at the table is constantly fighting over food?

Make it enjoyable

Mealtime can be torture for parents when we find ourselves in a power struggle over food. Remember: you can’t control what or how much your child chooses to eat, but you can control the food that is available. Make meal plans with a variety of foods, and let your child choose what to eat.

Just eating together does not guarantee closeness. Good conversation is a great way to relax and come together as a family. But, when you’re tired, it’s difficult to start good conversations.

Write or print some conversation starters, cut them apart, and keep them in a container on the table. Take turns choosing a question (or more than one) when you’re struggling to connect. Here are some serious and silly questions you can use to start:

Conversation starters (sorted by child’s age)

More Conversation Starters

If you’re looking to increase your connection with your child, try eating a favorite meal together. Then, repeat as often as you can.

Here is to fun, connecting family meals!

A last note: benefits of family mealtime are lost when screens are used. Turn off TVs, tablets, and phones, and start tasting your food and talking to your family.

Dinner is Served Presentation 11.16.2017 – Better Behavior Through Connection

This presentation can be downloaded here.

Thank you to everyone who attended our Community Dinner and Parenting Seminar last night. It was great to see both familiar and new faces and share our passion for connecting with your child.

We had a nice meal of taco soup, salad, and cookies.

Thank you to the Uintah County Library for providing a beautiful and inviting room, to Smith’s Bakery for their contribution to providing cookies.

Thank you also to Ashley Valley Food Pantry for accepting our donations and those from our community members today. We donated approximately $80 in food and $24.10 in cash with the help of those in attendance.

Dinner is Served

At Higgins Family Center, we are committed to strengthening families in our community. Research has shown that families who eat together have many positive outcomes. We will provide a simple home-cooked meal, open to the community, free-of-charge.

 

After the meal, we will provide a seminar on family, parenting, and/or relationship topics.

 

Bring your whole family, invite your friends, and join us at the Uintah County Library on Thursday, November 16, from 5:30-7:00 pm.

 

The event is completely free, with optional donations encouraged to support the Ashley Valley Food Pantry.

 

For more information, check out our flyer or visit us on FB @higginsfamilycenter